Sorry, that was me just bashing my head against my keyboard after watching this video of Jon Gosselin landing in the U.S. after vacationing in France with Christian Audigier and girlfriend Hailey “pass the blunt” Glassman.
- You are a tool. There is just no other way to say it. He seriously reminds me of the kid in junior high that thought he was such a badass for getting suspended two weeks in a row and roamed the halls grabbing girl’s asses thinking he was the coolest thing since sliced bread when secretly everyone that he was the biggest d-bag ever. This kid now lives in a trailer, has three teeth and still thinks he is the coolest thing since slice bread. Oh c’mon, you know who I’m talking about…we’ve all seen them.
- “One cup of coffee in France is $10.” Yes, we all know you went to France LA DEE FRIGGIN DA. Shut up.
- He tells the photographer’s he doesn’t want to discuss anything because he doesn’t want to get in trouble. Yet, he keeps talking about it. This is the equivalent to Maddie throwing a temper tantrum in the middle of a mall for attention. You teach them well, Jon.
- THAT IS THE UGLIEST SHIRT EVERRRRRRRR. STOP WEARING IT.
- Jon claims he’s been smoking “forever” again, please reverted to point #1. Cool kid on the playground that smokes to be “cool.” I’m sorry, are we in ninth grade? Did I miss something? I strongly doubt you were smoking in your home with EIGHT CHILDREN.
- As he checks his messages, I sincerely hope it’s Kate, ripping him a new one. We need to get that girl out for a one night stand if not to make her feel better to make America feel better that she is no longer hung up on this jackass.
- Jon tells the photographers his girlfriend is staying in France and he came back because he had to “work.” AKA hang out with his family on camera. God, I hate when “work” gets in the way of my life.
- Nice oversized Gucci bags…did you become a club promoter overnight? Did we miss something?
I’m disgusted. I hate this man. I hate those angry tiger t-shirts. I did not think it was possible to have so much hate for one breathing object in the world but Jon Gosselin has proved me wrong. Sigh.